Thursday, June 17, 2004

Turbulence: The Motion Sick Picture

I made it to Virginia last night, and thanks to basically the entire Midwest, I got here shaken and not stirred. I swear the plane actually got here by rolling end over end...I don't believe that we ever took off or actually made it into the air. I did not read/look at/work on my law review write-on packet. It has to be done by Tuesday if I am going to compete so I can overnight it back to school...I feel like subconsciously I'm making a decision here, but maybe I'll get it together...who knows.

Here's a recap of the past couple days.

First, I have two gigantic suitcases that both weigh approximately 539 pounds each. Only one has wheels. As I attempted to haul these through the hotel and the airport, not one, not two, but THREE different creepy old men commented on the size of my suitcases and how strong I must be to carry them all by myself. Yeah thanks. Nothing makes me happier than for strangers to point out that I look like an ox in public. Also, please don't offer to help or hold a door open asshole, I wouldn't want you to hurt yourself.

Second, during the layover in Las Vegas, I lost $20 on the slots in less that 5 minutes so I decided to just go stand in line and wait for the plane to board. Behind me was a man and a woman who pretty clearly had come to Vegas for a business trip of some sort, and while drunk had "related" to each other. She was hideous and he was a relatively attractive guy...he looked like every single guy I went to high school with in Florida (there's just a certain "look" that screams -- "I'm from a trailer park in South Florida")...but still pretty cute. They were exchanging last names and political affiliations and then she told him he looked like George But she goes on and on in this really annoying nasally voice for like 15 minutes about how hot he is and between every word she leans over to kiss him or touch him and he is clearly getting so freaked out...the wheels are turning to the tune of "Fatal Attraction." Then she tells him that people tell her she looks like Sigourney Weaver and that she saw Sigourney Weaver in New York once and they were about the same size and weight and had the same hair, so she believes it. At which point he busts out with "You look nothing like Sigourney Weaver...she's thin...and tall...and...attractive." This woman just leaned over and kissed him and let it go, but I actually laughed out loud. I think he's stuck with her forever.

Lastly, if you are the parent with a child who just randomly stands up, balls up his fists, and screams as loud as he can for as long as he can, and you laugh and think it's cute, even on an suck. Not funny.

Alright, so tomorrow I drive into D.C. to check into my apartment and then there is a whirlwind of activity until Sunday when hopefully I get dropped off there relatively early so I can get settled in, figure out how to get to work, and potentially do this write-on thing...but that's still up in the air. Posting may be random and light, but I'm gonna try to put up at least one a day, we'll see how that works out.

P.S. It's so HOT here. I had forgotten (or blocked it out). When I left Thinly Veiled Pacific Northwest University it was in the 50's...we've been wearing jackets for the past few days...I hope I don't spontaneously combust this summer or die of a festering heat rash. And I'm pretty sure Texas was this hot, but one year away and I've turned into a total pansy.
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