Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Diamonds are a girl's best friend...SAY IT!

So, I am torturing myself by sitting at home, alone, eating and watching crappy wedding shows on TLC. I just finished watching one called "Perfect Proposal" where they follow the groom as he makes preparations to ask his girlfriend to marry him. The show host just sort of hangs around while he picks out a ring and plans this extra-special proposal scenario and then she helps get the surprise going if need be.

So, the guy today made the engagement ring. Yup, made it. Out of silver and turquoise. And while I appreciate the fact that his girlfriend apparently isn't the "diamond type" (OK, I admit it, I totally don't appreciate it)...I just can't imagine getting a turquoise engagement ring. Believe me, having been engaged twice, I appreciate how far a nice diamond can get a guy. The whole thing was kind of weird. I think that as an aficionado of all things sparkly I just can't really imagine wanting anything except a nice shiny precious stone big enough to cause me to drag my left hand on the ground as I walk.

As an aside, but a funny one, my (second) ex-husband "planned" the whole engagement thing, at least to the best of his somewhat limited capabilities. He rented a movie, made dinner, was apparently supposed to be a romantic night at home. Except that about a week before I got there (we lived in different states) he had given himself food poisoning for the THIRD time and so I was scared to eat the dinner. Therefore, I was hungry and cranky when the movie went in. And, I know you're asking yourselves what movie he rented in order to woo me into accepting his marriage proposal. Well, let me tell you. The Pirates of Silicon Valley (shades of my high school prom here). Yup. So romantic. I fell asleep like ten minutes into it, and then basically woke up when he elbowed me in the ribs, shoved the ring in my face, and went "So, you wanna get hitched and make an honest man out of me?" Kind of amusing now, but not my dream proposal.

Also, I guess I haven't mentioned it before, but there are TWO ex-Mr. Spatulas. The first one is the creepy one I often reference on here as sort of an inbred redneck criminal. The second one is an OK guy who just should have stayed a good drinking buddy and friend. Anyway, I've opted not to go into gory detail about all that stuff on here, because it's not really relevant as I've been divorced from #2 for almost 3 years now, but see, now you know something about me that you didn't know before. Fun.

Anyway, the maintenance guy is here to fix the hinges on my patio door. A little scary that they are on the outside, the pins come out in about one minute, and I live on the first floor. So, in the interest of my own future bodily safety, I'm going to go supervise.
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