Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Where's my Freedom Toast?

I think my ear canals are deformed. No matter what kind of headphones I get they hurt and don't seem to fit in my ears. I'm damaged goods!

In other news, this woman is on Oprah selling her book, French Women Don't Get Fat. She is perhaps the most annoying woman I've had to listen to in like a week at least. She's all French and perky and "ooooh oui, no no no, you must savor every bite, you must learn to take pleasure in the simple deliciousness of food and eat off beautiful china for every meal and appreciate the joy of living...American women, you are so, so, GIGANTIC and LOUD and DISGUSTING!"

Whatever. Me and my deformed ears are going for a walk. Then we're going to come home and eat dinner the American way, on a paper plate in front of the television while surfing the internet, screeching into a cell phone, and gulping down every bite without chewing or even tasting it. That'll show her.
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