Friday, May 20, 2005

Friday Spies ©: The "Would You Rather" Edition

***Subtitle: The Friday Morning Hangover Edition***

From BTQ...just like always.

Would You Rather:

1. Live alone on a deserted island for 10 years or be paid to live at Neverland Ranch with the King of Pop for one year?

Definitely the deserted island. I have literally NO tolerance for most annoying things in life, and I have to think that M.J. and Neverland would pretty much max out my annoying meter in like one day. I can't live like that. Besides, according to some other meme that I did a while back, I get to take five books with me when I go to the deserted island, so maybe I could learn Italian or how to fold origami or something useful like that.

2. Be deaf or blind?

I would choose deaf. It seems much harder to be independent when you're have to worry about people shortchanging you when you give them money, you might get hit by a car crossing the street, you'd have to learn a whole new way to do most things in wouldn't even be able to check out hot guys!! (horrors!)

Deaf on the other hand doesn't seem like it would impact your life as much...but, I'm not deaf or blind so who am I to make that proclamation? I really, really, really love to read and I think the one thing I would miss if I was blind would be reading. If I was deaf I would probably miss being able to talk to my friends and family and hear their voices...that would suck. This question is kinda depressing.

3. Have skin which changed color depending on your mood or visible sight lines?

Since my skin already changes color depending on my mood thanks to my Irish heritage (any one of my friends will attest to this...also, the judges in appellate advocacy pointed it out BOTH nights..."oh goodness, you REALLY got red!"), I guess I'll take visible sight lines. I never look anywhere besides right into someone's eyes anyway...I would never crotch watch, that's so low-class.

4. Spend a year in prison or a year on tour with Celine Dion and John Tesh?

Normally I would go for prison, since I think Celine Dion is a shrieking blight on the planet, and John Tesh is...well...GOD, he's John Tesh...he plays the electronic keyboard or something right? HOWEVER, I will make an exception here because there is no way I could deal with prison. I cannot trade sexual favors for cigarettes, be locked in a small room and unable to move around, go to the bathroom in an open cell...oh my god, FREAK way could I make it even one day in prison. So, I guess it's the Dion-Tesh Tour'O'Wretchedness for me...I can always buy earplugs right?

5. Have a threesome with people you know or total strangers?

I have really never understood people that have sex in front of other people they know, that just seems bizarre to me. I'm not really the threesome type at all, but if I have to choose then I want total strangers. Preferably strangers from another country who will be sent back to their country of origin immediately after the "experience" where I will never have to worry about seeing them again. If it was people I knew I would never be able to look at them again...of course, if I did it at all I would never be able to look at MYSELF again, so there's that to think about I guess.
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