Tuesday, March 01, 2005


I dropped my backpack, with my laptop in it, today and damn near broke my wireless card in half. This could have been either the worst thing that's ever happened to me, or the best thing that's ever happened to my grades...but thankfully it still works (for now) so I guess it's all status quo for the time being.

Totally unrelated to my laptop or my wireless card, do you ever have a real big crush on someone and then when they finally talk to you, just in passing, you are totally mortified that you don't know their name. Yeah, me either...because that would be lame and we all know what a total rock-star I am in the Cabana Boy field of endeavour. If I did do something that lame I would totally try to steer the conversation towards beer though, because nothing is as endearing as looking like a total alcoholic in front of someone you don't even know but think is very cute.

I need to also thank Soupie for the Crappie award he and his astute readers presented me with...Crappiest Use of Weblog To Pick Up Members of the Opposite Sex. First off, I can't believe I won over Milbarge...my GOD! I might have to file a formal complaint about the voting process, that just can't be right. Secondly, I want to thank all my fans and readers who, like me, knew nothing about this award until after it was posted and so therefore probably weren't involved in giving it to me...also, if anyone knows a potential Cabana Boy they'd like to introduce me to, the field is wide open.

Last but not least...in the spirit of the Crappies...I want to present an award for the best use of the word "snack" in a print or online story about a naked person covered with cheese:

Around 5 a.m. July 18, 2004, Michael David Monn Sr., 23, McCall Road, Maryville, ``was highly intoxicated, broke into the John Sevier Pool snack bar area, stole some snacks and did some damage and was caught naked with some stolen snacks,'' Blount County District Attorney General Mike Gallegos told the courtroom.

Officer Scott Spicer found Monn that Sunday morning in the parking lot of John Sevier Pool on Sequoyah Avenue. He apparently scaled an 8-foot-tall fence and was seen running toward a Jeep with a box of stolen snacks.

In addition to being naked, he had nacho cheese in his hair, on his face and on his shoulders, according to an interview with Spicer last year. He also had a strong odor of alcohol and was semi-incoherent, the officer said.

In his Jeep, Maryville officers found clothing and an open bottle of vodka.

I have no idea what NDC was doing in Tennessee, but as we would say in the Air Force, "good on 'ya."
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