Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Evil, pure and simple from the Eighth Dimension!

Oh my god...OCI is completely ruining my life.  OK, that might be a slight exaggeration, but really and truly, I am so sick of cover letters and trying to manipulate the bullet points on my resume that I could scream.  I mean, let's be real here.  I am not in the top 10%, or even the top 25%, and honestly, after a summer of legal work, I am pretty much  not looking forward to thinking about another summer of legal work.  Also, I have a pretty kick ass resume, but I don't have any confidence that it matters in light of my pretty average to just one tiny step above average grades. 

My best friend and I often talk of running away to the coast and starting a bar...tentatively called either The Pink Snapper or The Angry Clam.  Is there a rule against having a bar/law office?  I mean, Ed had a bowling alley/law office...and that seemed to work out OK.  He had a wacky staff, and a cute was always fun, he won every case in one hour per week, and had a snackbar and shoe sanitizer and presumably a ball waxer (heh heh)  at his personal disposal 24 hours per day.  If Coca~Cola would like to hire me I would gladly take 1/4 of my pay in Diet Coke...I'm just putting that out there in case anyone knows someone who knows someone. 

Seriously though, the only jobs I am really interested in (for real, not just for the summer) are government jobs.  Is OCI worth my time and effort if I really want to work at a state/federal agency next summer (and hopefully permanently)?  You don't have to answer that, I'm just looking for an excuse to quit writing cover letters RIGHT NOW, instead of when I'm actually done.  Do you think it would help if I list this blog under publications?  No?  Really?  Oh well, it was worth a try.  Maybe one day someone who runs a bowling alley/law practice (or better yet a rum factory/Jimmy Buffett fan club/law office) will read this and offer me a summer associate position, and I will say "Hell yeah, bring on the beer and nachos...and don't forget to sanitize my shoes...I want the pink laces this time!  Memo? What memo?" 

Do you think Jimmy Buffett needs a summer law clerk?  What about James Spader?  Damnit.
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