Friday, February 24, 2006

Seriously though.

**This is a little something I wrote awhile back (OK, like two days ago) to remind myself not to call. I'm posting it because I already look at it like 30 times a day, so I might as well. I just got back from the gym. So there you go.**

Do. Not. Call.

Stop it.

Quit staring at the phone. Quit letting the anxiety build up while you wonder and wait to see if he'll call you. Quit thinking about it. You don't want him to call you anyway because you already know the answer to this entire question. It's NO. Emphatically, absolutely, assuredly, definitely, unmistakably, resoundingly, NO. No because it's not good for you. No because he can't be what you need him to be. No because you have too much going for you to let it slip at this point. No because he is the dam in a cartoon and you are the hero who plugs the breaking dam with her fingers and if you do this for him you'll never be able to let go because he has too many issues, too many problems, too many broken parts. No because anyone who takes him on will have to stand in that same spot forever, fingers in the dam, holding back the water and praying that it doesn't all fall apart.

My God...just let it go. If he does call it just opens up the wound for YET ANOTHER day, week, whatever (and let's face it, your friends are sick of seeing you mope over a guy that none of them thought was good enough for you). If he doesn't call, he's doing you the biggest favor of your life.

If he doesn't call it doesn't mean that you'll never meet anyone again. It doesn't mean that the time you invested was wasted. It doesn't mean you're already forgotten, or cast aside, or weren't important. Most importantly, it doesn't mean YOU are wrong, YOU are unworthy, YOU are unlovable, or YOU are broken. If he does call, if you're smart, you'll ignore the call, delete the voicemail, and go over to one of your friend's houses to watch TV or drink a beer and not obsess over this thing anymore.

In fact, whether he calls or not is not really the issue, is it? Someone else WILL call. Someone else WILL care. Someone else WILL want to sit on the couch and watch TV with you, or make you dinner, or hold your hand under the table at the bar while you drink pints and make fun of the locals. And it will be someone who will be capable of doing more than the bare minimum. This guy isn't worth all this angst. Stop angsting. Just stop. NO!


Go to the gym. Now.
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