Tuesday, February 28, 2006

I'm a stress zombie.

I didn't sleep well last night...I just kind of wasn't feeling well, and then I started having all these weird dreams that kept me up. And it was one of those nights where the temperature was never right, my stomach kind of hurt, I tossed and turned, the covers weren't right, I was thinking about all the things that I have to do, and all the things I'm not getting done. God, I hate that.

So, today I'm tired. I have yet to finish all the stuff I need to get done for tomorrow, let alone have a chance to practice it, and I'm so tired that I feel like I can't even assimilate all the information in a way that will allow me to not make any huge mistakes, or ask a bunch of questions that clearly violate the motions we argued and she ruled on last week.

I've noticed that when I'm not sleeping well, or I don't get enough sleep, it just makes everything BIGGER and BADDER. All my little problems seem HUGE, my anxiety levels seem out of control, I'm obsessing about shit that just yesterday I had under control, I'm not managing my stress, it's managing me. I've never been the type of person to do well with not enough sleep, but as I get older, I notice it's SO MUCH WORSE. One or two nights and I'm like a zombie. A depressed zombie. Geez.

I have to go figure out a way to do about 9 million hours of work in the next 45 minutes...so I better get on that. Let's all cross out fingers that I am able to sleep tonight or it's going to be bad...very very bad.
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