Last night, over beers, the talk turned to post-mortem wishes for our remains. Why? I have no idea. We all talked it over and here's the consensus on my disposition.
I would like to be cremated, mixed with glitter and pink rhinestones, and the sprinkled over Belgium.
Or, alternately, I would like to to be cremated, mixed with glitter and pink rhinestones, and then placed in a hideously guady urn...something that would make Liberace go "Don't you think that's a little much?" Said urn will be placed in M's front yard with a birdbath on top of it.
I tried to get Ex-Roomie and her bf to agree to divide up my ash/glitter/rhinestone mix into tiny little bags, like the sachets you get at weddings, and then have a big party and hand me out to everyone as a party favor, but they weren't going for it.
I pointed out to Ex-Roomie's bf that, in reference to cremation v. burial, "They'd probably stick me in the oven and all you'd hear is WHOOOOOSH! as my beer soaked body went up in flames."
We also discussed that thing where you can get your ashes pressed into a diamond...I guess it's kind of like a CZ or something. Ex-Roomie's bf said they come out really yellow and weird, and Ex-Roomie goes "Why?" My answer? "Because humans are filthy, disgusting creatures!" And I think it's probably true. Because I'm a scientist.
I turned in a graded commercial paper essay today - should be interesting to get it back. I am picturing a hit squad coming to my house and taking me out before I can pollute the legal community with my idiocy.
