Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Sorry - I've been busy!

Making a baby! Yup, that's right. The Boy and I, contrary to popular belief, actually HAVE done something useful with our lives and are currently incubating a tiny little miniature Spatula.

Here are some fun things I have learned about being pregnant:

1. It's hard to look excited when you are constantly on the verge of puking. It doesn't mean I'm not excited, so it's unnecessary to ask "Oh, is this a good thing?" when you congratulate me and I don't jump up and down and give you a big hug. I'm trying not to barf on your shoe.

2. People are so nice and mean so well, but the number of people who ask "So, was this planned?", is truly astounding. How should I answer that? "No. I wanted to be COMPLETELY off the drugs, but we just couldn't wait."

3. No one can out-burp a pregnant lady. We won't even talk about all the other gross stuff my husband has recently discovered about me. I'm sure he yearns for the days when I was all shy and didn't want to gross him out with my bodily functions. Now they're appropriate dinner conversation and any time, day or night, is the right time to remind him just where in the digestive process I am at that exact moment.

4. The baby is called a "fetal pole" on the ultrasound machine. Today we saw it moving and wiggling and declared it to be a "fetal pole dancer". I was pretty much the only person that thought this was funny. We're considering naming it Angel Chastity Heaven Cherry Pie Spatula, just to cement things.

5. Haagen Daaz Peppermint Bark Ice Cream is the Best. Thing. Ever. for pregnant ladies. If your lady is pregnant now, has ever been pregnant, or is even just a female, buy this for her. I really, really mean it.

Anyway, needless to say, we are extremely happy and excited. Yes, it was planned. Yes, I will probably write about it now that we've told everyone. I'm almost done with the spectacularly evil first trimester. Hallelujah.